Today.....

I spend a lot of time thinking about things I should do. I have a LOT of great ideas... just not so great on the follow through. I also have lots of great excuses for why I don't do things - but that also doesn't get a lot accomplished. Today I decided that I am done being jealous of people that do, stop comparing myself to others, and stop not acting on my great ideas.
One of those ideas was inspired by a mom of a kid in my 5th grade class. She gave me an interesting gift. A box for each of you made of recycled materials, but the interesting part was her instructions. She told me to keep letters from other people but more importantly from myself inside the boxes. Her mother passed away when she was a teen ager and she told me that more than anything in the world she wishes she had letters from her mom. A morbid thought to think that I should go before you, but life has proved again and again that I am not in charge no matter how much I plan. I am not planning on dying, but I did start thinking that I want you to know how much I love you in different stages of your life. I want to remember all those silly little stories that I swear I could never forget but somehow they get jumbled as you grow and do other things.
So this blog is inspired by that mom, who was thoughtful enough to share with me some very personal "motherly advice". My sister, Lora, for challenging our family to keep in better touch through blogging and for trying again and again to be the peacemaker. And Jabiz, our neighbor. He has a blog for his daughter, Kaia. It is my envy. He takes photos of them, as a family, every week. It is so fun, in a voyeuristic way, to experience every day events through writing and photos and to be a part of the little changes that you don't notice week to week. It is insightful to be privy to his thoughts about his daughter. I respect him so much for being so candid and honest.
So here we go. I am committing to keep up and if I don't keep up - not to bag it, but pick up and keep going. I'm committed to be a great mom. To love you forever and to do whatever it takes to see you grow up happy, productive, excited, responsible, compassionate and limitless. I always think about the things you are and will be. I compose letters to you in my head all the time (sounds very corny, but it's true) If only I had a scribe to follow me around catching those thoughts! I guess I will be my own scribe and hopefully this blog can be the net to catch the random thoughts.

As my dad always says at the close of letters; "I'll love you forever. I'll like you for always."